


you looked at me

by banditoheart (2space_lesbo1)



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Death, Despair Disease (Dangan Ronpa), Gen, Graphic Description of Corpses, Gundham Tanaka Has Despair Disease, Hinata Hajime Has Despair Disease, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Medical Procedures, Not Beta Read, Possibly Multchapter, Sick Character, Sickfic, Suicidal Ideation, im trying, ive never written this many characters at once im sorey of some seem more left out than others, like iv and shit, or if any are ooc lol, we'll see
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-29
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-15 20:07:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 18,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29070042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/2space_lesbo1/pseuds/banditoheart
Summary: When Hajime woke up, he found that he couldn't stop smiling.
Relationships: Hinata Hajime & Kuzuryu Fuyuhiko, Hinata Hajime & Owari Akane, Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito, Sonia Nevermind/Tanaka Gundham
Comments: 91
Kudos: 574





	1. The Disease

**Author's Note:**

> HIIIIII
> 
> this is my first time writing for dra, and rn, i've only seen all of sdr2, so pls no spoilers for the other games. i'm in the middle of v3 but i only just now got past the first trial lmao
> 
> ANYWAY
> 
> i saw some fanart of hajime with the despair disease, and his version of it was the "happiness disease". i loved the idea and just had to write it lol
> 
> like said in the tags, i don't normally write this many characters together in scenes such as this. so if some of them feel less written than the others, or if any are ooc, then that's because i'm still learning how to write them, so pls gimme some leeway 😭😭😭
> 
> in this au, hajime, akane and gandhum have the despair disease at first, until later kazuichi contracts his own version(if i write that far, anyway). akane still has the disease cause when i started writing i didn't think of changing any of the other characters with the disease and by the time i did i was too lazy to change it lmao. 
> 
> so the versions of the disease are as follows to avoid any confusion:
> 
> hajime's= happiness disease  
> gandum's= inferiority disease  
> akane's= coward disease
> 
> the sentences in the ()s are meant to not be grammatically correct, and serve as hajime's inner thoughts that he can't voice. 
> 
> OKAY ENOUGH OF ME YAPPING
> 
> if you enjoy it, lemme know if you'd like me to continue it, and lemme know how i did writing them all ^^ i LOVE comments :D

Hajime couldn't stop smiling. 

It was the first thing he'd noticed upon waking up- well, after the fact he suddenly couldn't breathe, along with a horrible pain blossoming behind his skull before spreading through the rest of his body, aware of how hot he suddenly felt. He'd shot up in his bed, and his face was suddenly broken into a wide grin. The grin was so large, in fact, that it made his cheeks hurt and his teeth smart. But… that was okay(it wasn't)! He felt great(he didn't)! So great, in fact, that he burst out laughing(oh god it hurt). 

His sudden burst of laughter broke his otherwise silent room, and his eyes darted to his window to check if it was morning. He wanted to share his state of happiness with his friends- all of them(stop please make it stop it hurts)! They deserved to be happy, too, like he was, after all(this isn't happiness this is pain stop stop _ stopstop _ )! He instantly bolts out from beneath his covers, bare feet hitting the cold floor of his cabin. He's so excited and thrilled at the thought of sharing his happiness with his friends. 

So, of course he ignores the way he wants to collapse as soon as his weight lands on his feet. Of course he ignores how his head pounds with pain and his chest feels nearly too tight to breathe. None of that matters- he's so happy(nonononononono)!

He nearly forgets to dress and get his shoes on, vibrating with his barely contained happiness. The thought makes him laugh aloud at his own memory lapse, playfully slapping himself on his forehead. He opens his door, the grin that is seemingly permanently plastered to his face growing even larger. It has grown so wide, in fact, that the corners of his eyes prick with tears. But that doesn't matter, he's so happy(this isn't happiness what is this help)! 

He forces his body to continue moving towards the restaurant, basically dragging his feet to keep walking. He wants to see all of his friends so, so badly. He wants to share his happiness(this is so painful why can't he stop smiling)! 

The stairs are a tad more difficult, and he stumbles on a few of his steps, and he pauses to laugh at his clumsiness a few times, before pushing forward again.

When he finally makes it to the top, he finds the restaurant completely empty, aside from Hiyoko and a somewhat (terrifying) beautiful shrine! The shrine has many candles surrounding it, the smoke from the flames hovering over the top, and around the animal skulls hanging from either side. Hiyoko is standing just in front of it, her expression one of surprise, like she was caught red handed doing something. The sight of both this (scary) amazing shrine  _ and  _ one of his friends fills him with delight. 

But before he could speak, Hiyoko’s expression sours, turning from one of shock to one of disgust, “Ew, why are you smiling like that, Hajime?” She gasps, her eyes going even wider. “Are you planning to do something to me?!”

A laugh bubbles in his chest, and it's too (painful) wonderful to ignore, so he releases it boisterously. This seems to only freak Hiyoko out further, as she looks from Hajime to the exit. He has to hunch over slightly as the laughter continued at the hilarious scene(this wasn't funny, stop laughing why can't he stop please stop). 

“Of course not!” he exclaimed once the laughing eased enough to allow him to speak. He couldn't keep himself from continuing to chuckle, however. His cheeks were starting to get sore from grinning. “I'm just- I'm so happy! I love that shrine- I love whatever it's for- I love you and I love life!” 

He wraps his arms around himself as his body continues to tremble with his laughter, which has quieted down to a breathy version(it hurts). Hiyoko continues to stare at him through wide eyes, her face turning a soft pink. 

“What the hell is wrong with you?” she demanded, pointing an accusatory finger at him. He raises an eyebrow at her to express his confusion, but the grin stays perfectly in place. “I mean- of course the shrine is awesome, there's no doubt of that,” she sounds proud of it and herself. Ah, she must have built it. How wonderful. The grin grows larger at the thought, and tears escape the corners of his eyes, “But you- you never act like this!” 

“Hahaha, why do you sound so mean?” he asked her in return, his laughter finally( _ finally thank god _ ) ceasing. Her lips purse at him, eyebrows scrunching together with her discontentment. “I'm just so, so happy!! Aren't you too?” 

“How could I be?! Mahiru is dead, you asshole!” Hiyoko shouted, now thoroughly pissed off at him. But why(Harumi was our friend she died she's dead she's gone why is he not sad)? That doesn't sense at all. 

“But that was yesterday!” Hajime pointed out, hoping to help her remember. It was yesterday- it didn't matter today, they should be happy(it did matter of fucking course it mattered why is he saying this he doesn't want to)! 

Hiyoko is horrified, if her face has anything to say about it. She stutters for a few seconds, surprisingly, and opens her mouth to speak, when the sound of a loud voice someone crying interrupted her. Hajime’s eyes widened at the sound of crying- why was someone crying(he wants to cry why can't he cry or at least stop smiling please help)? They should be happy, like he is! 

“Oh, Hajime!” it was Kazuichi’s voice. Behind him trailed a crying Akane. The girl was crying so hard, in fact, that her hunched shoulders were shaking with her sobs. She's wiping furiously at the tears running down her cheeks fruitlessly, and a line of snot drips from one of her nostrils. She doesn't even move to grab some food, which was out of her character. But why was she so sad? Hajime couldn't understand(Nekomaru was hurt, possibly dead, Mahiru is dead, he shouldn't be smiling why can't he stop smiling). “Thank goodness you're- AAAAHHH!”

Kazuichi had noticed the wonderful shrine, his hands flailing as his eyes nearly burst out of their sockets. Hajime snorts at his reaction, before falling into another laughing fit. Akane cries louder, probably from a mixture of Kazuichi’s shout and the sight of the beautiful shrine. “WHAT IS THAT?” Kazuichi cried, wildly pointing at the shrine. “It's horrifying!!”

“No way, Soda!!” Hajime retorted happily, moving to Kazuichi’s side to grip one of his shoulders. He shuts his eyes to allow his grin to grow ever larger, lightly(loudly) laughing to appease his friend. “It's an awesome shrine! It makes me so happy!! Doesn't it make you happy?” 

“It- it’s s- so sc- scary!!” Akane wailed, her tears growing larger, falling faster down her cheeks. “Who- who would make so- something like thaaat!!” 

“Why is big boobs crying so much?” Hiyoko asked, her voice filled with disdain. “She's acting as weird as the freak Hajime.” 

Kazuichi’s eyes dart from Hajime’s grinning face, to Akane’s devastated face, all the way to Hiyoko’s scornful face. He brushes Hajime’s hand from his shoulder, and Hajime can feel the smile on his face lessen slightly(hardly at all it still hurts why can't he stop help) at the action. The other boy is shaking his head furiously, his own tears sliding down his face. 

“What the hell is happening? I don't understand!” Kazuichi exclaimed. He looks to Hiyoko, his desperation now reaching out to her. 

“Don't ask me!” Hiyoko snapped, crossing her arms over her chest furiously. “I came in here, saw this nice shrine, and then that freak came in acting like a freak!” 

“He never laughs this much!” Kazuichi pointed out, and Hajime laughed loudly at this. 

“What's the matter with me laughing?” Hajime asked curiously, trying to get close to Kazuichi once more. But the other boy keeps dodging him, whimpering like he was an enemy trying to attack him. “I'm just so happy!” 

“H- how are y- you happyyyyy??” Akane sobbed, sniffing dramatically. She shoves one of her hand’s heels into both of her eyes in turn. “Nek- Nekomaru i- is hurt. And it- it's my faaaauuulltt!!”

Hajime abandons trying to reach Kazuichi to instead wrap his arms around Akane’s shoulders, smiling gently(painfully) to her. “That was yesterday!” he explained, hoping to help her see why she shouldn't be sad anymore. “Today he isn't hurt!” 

Akane pauses in her crying momentarily to glance up at him, sniffling a bit quieter now. “R- really? He- he's not hurt anymore?” when he shakes his head no in confirmation, his smile turning pleasant, she breaks down again, burying her face in his chest. “Waaaah! B- but he's s- still gone because of meee!” 

He pats her back comfortingly, glancing up at the sound of footsteps approaching. Nagito has entered the restaurant, looking first at the shrine, then at Kazuichi and Hiyoko cowering on the other side of the room, and then at a grinning Hajime hugging a sobbing Akane. His pale eyes go just as wide as both Kazuichi’s and Hiyoko’s had gone earlier. 

“Hajime? What's going on?” he said, clearly curious of what the heck was happening. And, of course, Hajime was beyond happy to help him. 

He pulls himself from Akane, her crying growing loud once again at the loss of the contact. He ignores it for now, because he could help her later- Nagito needs his help now(why was Akane crying what is that shrine why can't I stop smiling)! 

“Nagito!!” Hajime exclaimed in greeting, tightly gripping one of Komaeda’s hands. The other boy’s eyebrows shoot up to his hairline at the voluntary action- he was probably thinking about how Hajime didn't engage in contact, and normally avoided it. But that doesn't matter today- he was so happy he  _ wants _ to touch people! …Especially Nagito. The idea of it makes him even happier(please god help him)! “Hiyoko made this beautiful shrine, it makes me so happy! Doesn't it make you happy!” He pauses to laugh for a few seconds, and Nagito frowns for some reason. Why would he frown right now? He should be happy, too! “I'm also very happy to see you! You make me so happy!” He laughs once more, shoulders shaking with the effort(why is he saying that stop talking stop smiling stop laughing stop it hurts it hurts it hurts). 

With his cheeks painted a light red, Nagito gently pries Hajime’s hand from his own, still frowning. Hajime doesn't like that. Why wasn't he smiling, too? Shouldn't he be happy to see Hajime like Hajime is happy to see him? 

“Are you feeling alright, Hajime?” Nagito asked, instead of acknowledging any of his past words. That confused Hajime further. Why was Nagito ignoring what he was saying(because he doesn't want to say it he knows he's not right help him help him please)? 

“I feel so happy!” Hajime repeated the same phrase, bouncing on the balls of his feet, his legs trembling under the movement. 

A few more people are piling in, as well, and Hajime is going to turn his head- he wants to greet them, to say hello, to make them happy, too!-, but a very cold, very smooth hand is suddenly pressed against his hot forehead, stopping the movement. Nagito’s eyes widen, his mouth falling open as he looks to one of the new occupants. 

“Hajime, you're burning up,” Nagito informed him, as if it mattered. “You feel hot- too hot. Mikan-” he can hear her gasp in surprise at being called, and he wants to look at her, but Nagito’s hand on his head(his fingers are lightly rubbing through the tips of his hair it feels nice don't stop please help) keeps him from doing so, unable to stop himself from leaning into the cool touch. He was really hot, and Nagito’s hand did feel really nice, it was making him happy- “Could you come here a second?” 

At his request, Mikan appears beside both of them, and Hajime now pulls his head- only a tad reluctantly- from Nagito’s cold hand to grin at her. She squeals at his expression before pressing her own hand to his forehead, quickly pulling it back. 

“Ee- eek!” she exclaimed. “He- he’s as hot as Gandham!”

“Thank you, Mikan!” Hajime said happily, the fact that Mikan said something so kind to him made the grin grow impossibly large once more(it hurts he can't stop). Oddly enough, though, both Mikan and Nagito are frowning at him. 

“I'm so sorry!” Gandham suddenly shouted, his face hidden behind his scarf. It looks like he's frowning, too, and why is everyone frowning(two people died Nekomaru is hurt he should be frowning why isn't he frowning)? Hajime couldn't understand. “It's probably somehow my fault… The demons affecting me must have infected him, too, because I didn't have high enough defenses to keep them back!” 

“Th- there are demons?!” Akane was shouting as well, terrified of the possible demons. 

“Akane, please calm down,” Sonia said, her voice low and calm and appeasing. Hajime grins at the princess- he hadn't noticed her at first! But she was here, too, and that makes him very happy(he still can't stop smiling why can't he stop please sonia)! “I am sure the demons cannot affect you, as well.” 

“They- they must all be s- sick,” Mikan informed everyone gathered, her hands hovering in front of herself as she timidly spoke. Hajime grabs one of her hands, as well as one of Nagito’s, and squeezes them to hopefully make them happy, too(please help him he could do this please notice please help). 

“Sick?!” Hiyoko exclaimed, and she quickly ran from Kazuichi. “Get away from me then!” 

“Me??” Kazuichi said. “I'm not sick!!”

“Hajime touched you! Don't touch me you probably have it!!” Hiyoko yelled, her eyes flying back and forth sporadically to make sure no one was coming near her. “Everyone stay away from me!” 

“Calm the fuck down!” oh, when had Fuyuhiko gotten here? He turns his smiling face to the yakuza, and releases both hands he'd been holding captive to rush over to the shorter boy. “Freaking the fuck out won't- HEY!” 

He's interrupted when Hajime throws his arms around him, rubbing his cheek against his short hair(why is he doing this why can't he stop). “Baby gangsta!!” he said with laughter(no please don't laugh again it hurts), making sure to hug him tightly. Fuyuhiko sputters non coherently, not even pushing at the taller boy due to his surprise. “I'm so happy to see you!!!” 

“Get the hell off!” Fuyuhiko protests. His face is burning a bright red, and his struggles are weak. He must still be exhausted from his injuries. But that's okay- Hajime could make him happy again by hugging him(he lost his childhood friend his guardian his lover his everything he can't make him happy)! 

Monokuma’s loud laughter makes everyone pause. The half and half bear appears very suddenly in the center of the room, grinning almost as widely as Hajime was. 

“Well I'd say everyone is livening up some!” the bear exclaimed. Hajime doesn't stop hugging Fuyuhiko, but does turn his head to look at Monokuma. “Welcome to your third motive!!” 

“I like this motive!” Hajime replied, giggling. Fuyuhiko finally manages to push him off, but he doesn't mind right now. He bounces on the tips of his toes(stop his body hurts stop moving he wants to lay down), his hands shaking with his barely contained happiness. “It makes me feel happy!” 

“Oh, I'm sure it does, Hinata!” Monokuma chuckled, his dark eyes filled with sadistic mirth. “This is- drum roll please- the Despair Disease!!” 

“I love the Despair Disease!!” Hajime laughed, tears wetting his cheeks once more. He can feel someone’s gaze burning into the side of his head, and he turns his watery vision to find Nagito watching him closely, his frown deepening at the tears(he's crying it hurts please help). “Don't you, Nagito? It makes me so happy!” 

“The name and affects fills me with despair,” Nagito said with a heavy sigh, tearing his eyes to look at the bear. “It must affect each person differently, right? That's why Hajime is happy, Gandham is timid, and Akane won't stop crying?” 

“Ding ding ding!” Monokuma sang, and Akane bawls at how loud his voice is. Sonia pats her shoulder soothingly. “Right on the money, Komaeda!” He gestures to each infected- Hajime can't be infected, he feels happy!- in turn as he speaks, “Hinata is afflicted with the Happiness Disease- a change for the better, in my opinion! Gandham has the Inferiority Disease- he feels even more like trash than you do right now, Komaeda! And Akane has the Coward Disease, so she can't stop crying!” 

“He's right, I am a coward!” Akane wailed, completely ignoring Sonia’s comforting words and gestures. 

“It is true, a being such as myself will never level up to grow stronger,” Gandham muttered. “My Dark Devas of Destruction deserve a better master than myself. I am horribly useless. I couldn't even conquer the spreading demons, as weak as they were, for I am even weaker.” 

“That sounds wonderful!” Hajime added, bouncing up and down now(oh god it hurts he's about to fall over please stop). “This is making me so happy!” 

“H- how can we- we cure them?” Mikan said. Monokuma merely laughs. 

“By killing again, of course!” the bear said sadistically. 

“Is it contagious?” Chiaki asked next, and Hajime perks up further at her voice. He hadn't even noticed she'd been here this entire time! She looks tired, and he could help!!

“Very contagious!” Monokuma said, and Hiyoko moves even further from everyone else. 

“Are they gonna be okay?” Ibuki said, and Hajime wants to hug her now. Scratch that- he wants to hug everyone!! 

“Nope!” Monokuma replied joyously. “Soon enough, all three of them will die if no one is killed!” He bursts out laughing, and Hajime can't stop himself from joining in. 

“Why are you laughing too, Hinata?!” Hiyoko demands accusingly. “You're going to die, you freak!” 

“I'm just- just- so happy!” Hajime said between breaths of laughter. He's still crying. Whether from his too big grin, his painful laughter, or something else(it hurts it hurts it hurts) he wasn't sure. It didn't matter, though. He was so happy. He can hear Monokuma chuckling at him, and his sudden dilemma of not being able to stop laughing. “I- I can't stop laughing, I'm- I'm s- so hap- happy!!” 

He knows he's hyperventilating as he laughed now. But that wasn't important- nor was the fact that he was getting light headed important. He was so happy, and he just wants to laugh and laugh, so why stop(he's going to die here isn't he someone help him please)? He can faintly hear Akane’s crying getting louder as well, accompanied by Gandham berating himself in every sentence. He can also hear the others talking, but he can't understand them. His eyes screw shut as he keeps laughing hysterically(make it stop please make it stop). One of his hands curls up towards his chest, grabbing a handful of his shirt. 

He's still laughing when a hand suddenly comes to grip his shoulder, giving it a tight squeeze. 

“Hajime.” it’s Nagito's voice. The taller boy is directly beside him, keeping a tight grip on his shoulder. His other hand moves to hold Hajime’s hand, prying it from its deadly grip from his shirt before guiding down and away. “I know you're really happy, and that's great- I'm happy because you are.” Hajime’s eyes open at his words, and he can see Nagito is smiling too, now(Nagito please help him he can't breathe). But why does he still look sad, though? Oh well- he's smiling now so he is probably happy! “Do you know what would make me even happier? If you could drink some water for me, even if I am trash.” (He understands he's helping him he's helping him)

“Y- yes!!” Hajime exclaimed, and forces himself to focus on his laughter(his panic attack that wasn't laughter anymore he had been panicking). “It'll make me so happy to make you happy!” His breathing is slowing, the laughter quieting. He gets to a point where he only chuckles every few seconds, now, and Nagito is offering him a glass of water. “Th- thank you, Nagito! You make me so happy!” 

Nagito continues to smile at him as he finally takes the glass of water, trembling only a little bit as he brings it to his lips. Out of the corners of his eyes, he can see the others calming and guiding the infected from the restaurant. Sonia has left Akane’s side- somewhat reluctantly- and is leading Gandham from the room, adoomishing him gently whenever he speaks badly about himself. Kazuichi is helping Akane down the steps, making sure she doesn't trip and fall. Mikan is following both pairs, tightly frowning. He doesn't see Chiaki or Hiyoko, but he does see Fuyuhiko standing and watching him and Nagito nearby, eyebrows knitted together tightly. 

After gulping down some of the water, Hajime smiles at Nagito again. “Where did everyone else go? I wanted to make them happy!” 

“They're helping the others get to the hospital,” Nagito explained, his voice low and somehow soothing. His tone of voice currently was one Hajime hasn't heard much, aside from directly after he'd woken up on the beach, and it really makes him happy. He sounded so nice and caring. And while Hajime doesn’t feel bad(his legs are weak he's weak he's about to pass out) and doesn't need caring for, the thought of Nagito caring for him anyway made him incredibly happy. “I stayed to help you get there, and Fuyuhiko is making sure that I don't do anything. Which is strange, but it makes sense that none of them would trust someone like me.” 

“But why wouldn't they trust you?” Hajime asked, blinking at him owlishly. “You make me so happy- don't they know that?” 

Nagito's cheeks are a light pink again. The sight makes Hajime even happier, he looks so cute. His smile wavers momentarily, before he keeps it plastered on for Hajime’s sake. “Yes, of course they do,” Nagito replied after a moment, taking the cup from Hajime’s hands once he's done. He sets it to the side on a nearby table, before clasping one of Hajime’s hands. The action makes Hajime even happier, and he rocks from his toes to his heels. “I didn't mean what I said- Fuyuhiko is here to make you happy too.” 

“I am?” Fuyuhiko asked stupidly, and Hajime giggles at his reaction. Then, the yakuza is smiling, too, and Hajime is grinning again. “Yes, I am!” He laughs, and even though it sounds forced, it makes Hajime even happier. 

“I'd be happy to go with you to the hospital!” Hajime said with a small giggle. “Let's go!” 

He dances forward, all but dragging Nagito along behind him. Fuyuhiko let out a noise of shock and hurried to follow them. 

The way to the hospital was a long one. Partly due to Hajime stopping every few seconds to look at something that particularly stuck out to him, and largely due to him falling over, suddenly too tired to walk on his own. 

Nagito and Fuyuhiko stood over him, both frowning at him as he sprawled across the ground beneath them. He rolls his head side to side, still unable to stop grinning as his legs and entire body  _ ache _ . But it's okay, that doesn't matter when their worry for him makes him so happy! 

“I think I'll stay here, I'm very happy to!” Hajime told them, breathing heavily before laughing loudly again(no he doesn't want to laugh again please don't make him laugh again). “The ground is so comfortable it's making me even happier!” 

Fuyuhiko growls with his clear unhappiness, and Hajime’s eyes snap to his angry expression. “Goddammit, this is taking for fucking ever,” he muttered. “Hinata, get your ass up!” 

“Now now,” Nagito said appeasingly, his hands held up in a calming manner. He's smiling now as he sits beside Hajime on the ground. Hajime grins up at him, happy that he was joining him on the ground. He's so comfortable here, even if the ground is horribly rigid, and he was burning up under the sun’s glare(he feels like he's going to pass out). “I'm sure Hajime just needs a break. We’re both happy to wait for him to go to the hospital again. Right, Kuzuryu?” 

And if Hajime hadn't been watching, he wouldn't have noticed the moment of Nagito’s eyes sharpening almost unnoticeably, and Fuyuhiko’s shoulders hunching in admission. 

“No, of course we don’t,” Fuyuhiko said with a groan, plopping down on Hajime’s other side. Hajime grins at him, and with shaking hands, he sloppily grabs both of their hands. He could feel Fuyuhiko flinch before taking hold of his in return, while Nagito’s somehow still cold hand instantly wrapped around his. 

“Just take your time to catch your breath, Hajime,” Nagito said soothingly, and his thumb traces circles along his knuckles. Hajime likes the sensation, and he focuses on it, his grin relaxing a few fractions to be a small smile(thank god it doesn't hurt as bad). 

They remain there for a while, Hajime wasn't keeping track of the time, until he informs them, “I want to make you happy by going to the hospital, but I don't think I can walk anymore. I'm sorry. But I am still happy!” He has to assure them that he's still happy, because he  _ is  _ still happy(he can't move his limbs are led his chest is burning his throat is aching). He's happy to lay there with them and never move again, in fact. 

“Don't worry, it won't be a problem,” Nagito tells him gently, and looks over to Fuyuhiko. He's still smiling, and it makes Hajime happy. He has such a pretty and calming smile. “Kuzuryu and I can help you get there.” 

“Goddammit,” Fuyuhiko mumbled, before saying, “Yes, we can help you walk, Hinata. We'd be happy to.” It sounds forced, still, but Hajime is happy he's trying to appease him, even if it is fake. Oh, when had Hajime started sweating? He must look disgusting. He laughs at the thought. “Wish he wasn't laughing so damn much…”

Hajime doesn't reply to that, too focused on Nagito standing, the taller boy tugging on his hand in the process. Fuyuhiko stands as well as Hajime works his legs, even as they protest. He sluggishly puts them underneath himself, and, with Nagito’s help, he finally gets to his feet, nearly falling over again. But Fuyuhiko catches him, helping him to get steady again. 

“I'm so happy you two are helping me,” Hajime said, panting heavily(he wants to fall over again let him fall let him pass out please he doesn't want to be awake). “Thank you so much!” 

“It's not a problem, Hajime,” Nagito reassured. Hajime grins at him, and he offers a small smile in return. 

Once Hajime is as balanced as he's going to get, both Nagito and Fuyuhiko help urge him back on the right path. It takes them a while longer to get there, and when they do, Mikan is waiting for them. 

“Wh- what took y-you guys so long?” she stammered. Sonia waves to them politely, standing towards the back of the waiting room. “We g- got the other two dressed and r- resting already.” 

“Hajime just needed a short rest on the way,” Nagito informs Mikan with a small smile. Hajime groans in pain, contradicting the large smile still glue to his face. He leans heavily against Nagito as he's hit with yet another wave of exhaustion, his head coming to rest on the taller boy’s shoulder. Nagito doesn't say anything about it, and Hajime is happy to stay there. Happy to even fall asleep. He's even beginning to doze, Nagito’s soft scent lulling him. 

But only a few seconds later he's being shaken awake. His eyes open sluggishly, and he's in a new room, sitting on a bed of some kind. The lighting is dim and fluorescent, and Nagito is crouched in front of him. Cool air nips at his suddenly bare chest, and he looks down to find his shirt is neatly folded on a chair nearby. Nagito is working on removing his shoes and socks, his long fingers working nimbly. He also takes notice of a nearby pole holding an IV bag, and traces the tube from the bag to where the needle is sticking from his arm. Must be medicine, since they think he's sick. The idea of that makes him happy that theyre worried enough about him to give him medicine. 

“Where are we?” Hajime asked, his voice slurring together. He's half naked, cold, and alone with Nagito in an unfamiliar room with the door closed. Oh, and the other boy is basically undressing him. Normally he'd be horrified by this particular scenario, and deep down he might be, but he's just happy. Happy to be inside where it's cool, happy to finally be sitting on a comfy surface, and happy to be with Nagito in the first place. 

“We’re in your hospital room, Hajime,” Nagito explained to him gently, setting his shoes and socks aside. He offers the other boy a shaky smile, one that doesn't quite reach his eyes, and Hajime’s happiness muddled mind can't understand or even notice it. “I'm sorry that I undressed you thus far- I'm sure you'll want to take a hot shower to be rid of my touch later.” He pauses, and his smile grows larger, more forced. Hajime’s smile grows wider in return at the sight, and he reaches a hand out blindly, and his smile doubles when Nagito takes it in his own once more. He has such a nice smile. And nice hands. His hands are so soft and cool. “But you need to change into a hospital gown. Do you want any more help?” 

When Hajime doesn't answer instantly- he's so tired, and his cheeks hurt, but he keeps smiling anyway- Nagito is quick to add, “Oh, why would I even assume that? You wouldn't want help from someone like me, anyway! I'm so sorry no one else was able to help you, I'm sure you'd rather another-”

“I'd be very happy if you helped me more,” Hajime said, his voice thick with a drawl. Nagito stops in his self deprecating rambling and instantly nods in response. He's still smiling, like Hajime was. Hajime really appreciated it(he knows he knows he can't stop he's smiling too but it hurts he's sorry). 

Nagito wraps an arm around his shoulders, and, once more displaying his hidden strength, he helps Hajime stand up. He moves back a step to allow him room to remove his pants, and averts his eyes, but Hajime doesn't mind too much. He's happy that Nagito is willing to help him so much, and he's even happier that he's handing him the gown he’d be wearing for the foreseeable future. Once it's draped around his shoulders, he allows Nagito’s nimble hands to tie it tightly shut. 

The other boy’s cheeks are a bright pink now, and that same pink has spread to the tip of his nose and the shells of his ears, and he's avoiding eye contact. Hajime thinks it's cute, and it makes him happy. His grin is unbearable now as he takes both of Nagito’s hands, swinging them back and forth. 

“You make me so happy, Ko,” Hajime said, using the nickname he rarely used for the other boy. Nagito jumps in surprise at the usage, his widening eyes snapping to his face. Hajime can't stop himself from giggling at the action, and hardly notices Nagito slowly guiding him to the bed again. “I love you so much- you're so cute and pretty!” (stop talking shut up he's going to know now oh god shut up)

He's being pushed to lay down now, and he doesn't fight it. He's happy to finally(finally please shut up please stop moving please sleep) laying down, his exhausted body sinking into the thin mattress beneath him. 

“Haha,” Nagito chuckled, and he uses one of his hands to brush Hajime’s hair from his face. Hajime likes that. It felt good and it makes him happy inside, despite the fact his chest and lungs are aching from his earlier laughing fits. “I know you don't mean any of that, it's the disease talking- but thank you so much for saying that to trash like me.” 

And suddenly, for a blessed, beautiful few seconds, the painful smile on Hajime’s face falls, and ignoring his now throbbing cheeks and chest and body, he sits up and jabs a finger in the other boy’s chest. “I mean all of that,”(stop talking please stop talking) he said seriously, not a hint of his previous happiness on his face. “I may not fully understand you, and you've made me angry a few times before, but that doesn't make what I said any less true.”(oh god he knows now) And that's when the cursed grin returns in full force(it fucking hurts), seeming to blind Nagito, his eyes darting to the floor. “But you make me extremely happy either way!” 

The pink on Nagito’s face darkness to a light red, and the white haired boy stutters. Hajime finds it adorably amusing, and he makes sure to thread his fingers through Nagito’s, to ensure they're holding hands again. 

“It would make me… very happy…” Hajime mutters, the exhaustion finally getting to him(it's been affecting him all he wanted to do was sleep why is it only working now). “...if you stayed… with me…” 

Nagito’s breath caught, and Hajime wanted to ask why, to understand why what he said baffled him, but his eyes were slipping shut. And, as soon as they are shut, he's knocked out. Must have been the IV. 


	2. The First Attempt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yyyyyooooo i ended up writing more!!!
> 
> thanks to everyone who left comments. i love em a lot :>
> 
> i'm writing a third chapter now, but we'll see if i have the motive to finish it haha 
> 
> enjoy!

When Hajime reawakened, it was to bright light, his body filled with pain, and Nagito sitting in a chair beside his chair, their hands still intertwined. Did… he stay all night at his side because he'd been holding his hand? He feels guilt- Happy that he'd do something like that! Nagito was so considerate, and that idea filled him to the brim with happiness. 

His normally cold hand has warmed in Hajime’s tight grip, being warmed by his higher body heat. Hajime pushes himself up into a sitting position, despite his aching body(please lay down please return to sleep please please-). He spots two separate trays on the table beside his bed, one still adorned with food, the other empty of said food. He tilts his head curiously at the sight, but when his stomach growls, demanding food, he doesn't question it, hesitantly releasing Nagito’s hand to grab the bowl of still warm soup. 

It smells of chicken and carrots, and as the taste fills his palate, he hums with happiness. It tasted wonderful- the chicken, noodles and carrots all warm and mushy after being cooked. 

Nagito stirs in the seat beside him, before his eyes slowly open. He jolts up when he sees Hajime awake and eating- his hands shaking as he holds the bowl close to his chest, as he uses the spoon to feed himself. He may spill some of the soup on himself a few times, but that's okay. It's funny, actually, and he can't stop himself from bursting out with laughter(oh god no not again please no). 

His laughter quickly becomes too much for him to handle, and the bowl slips from his grasp, his other grip on the spoon tightening until his knuckles become white. The soup soaks into both the blanket and sheets covering him, before heating the tops of his legs, and that just makes him laugh even louder and harder(he breathe he can't see he can't think help). 

There's a thin hand gripping his shoulder a moment later, while another grabs the bowl, pulling it away. He begins to hiccup along with his laughter, and that somehow only makes him laugh harder(how could he laugh harder it hurts alright it hurts more oh god he can't breathe). 

“I'm happy to see you're awake, Hajime,” Nagito said. He sounds cheerful, but there was also a strain to his voice, as if he was stressed out by the sight of Hajime laughing so hard. Which doesn't make much sense to Hajime(he must look insane he's going to die). He's happy, he's laughing, and Nagito should be, too. “But I'd be even happier if you could drink some of this water for me.” 

A glass of water suddenly appears in his limited field of vision, and the thought of making Nagito happier inspires him to reach for it with shaking hands. But then the cup is pulled back, and Nagito is saying, “No, it's alright. I'm happy to help you drink it.” (he sees his hands are too shaky he's helping thank god) 

Hajime manages a nod, and angles his head back enough to allow Nagito to hold the cup to his lips. He nearly chokes on it for a moment, and Nagito apologetically pats his back, but it helps him catch his breath again, helps him cease in his laughter(thank god). He swallows some of the room temperature water, the liquid soothing his stinging throat. 

“You did great, Hajime,” Nagito said gently, and offered him a gentle smile as he drew the now empty cup from his mouth. Hajime turns his still plastered grin on him, glad that he could make his friend(was he his friend? he had to be his friend) happy. 

“Thank you, Ko!” Hajime exclaimed, and grabbed Nagito’s now empty hand. He squeezes it tightly, continuing to ignore his soggy bed covers. “I'm so happy to see you stayed with me through the night!” 

Nagito chuckles lightly, his eyes hiding that curious sadness in them, still. Hajime wants to reach into his eyes, drag that sadness out and crush it with his own two hands. He wanted Nagito to be as happy as he was, with no sign of sadness about him. “It was more of two days,” he informed the other boy, and Hajime’s eyes grow wide. 

“I slept two full days?!” he shouted, his grin widening. “That must be why I feel so good!” (he doesn't feel good his body aches it's sluggish he wants to go back to sleep let him sleep please) But then he tilts his head with curiosity, “But how did you eat?” 

“Miss Tskumi was kind enough to provide someone as horrible as me with food,” Nagito replied, easily keeping that small smile on his face. “It made my job of watching over you much easier, though. So I don't mind.” 

“You're watching over me?” Hajime asked next, and his grin strains as it widened even further. The thought of Nagito staying with him throughout the two days he was asleep filled him with so much happiness and glee, it was making his body tingle(that must be the pain). “Why?” 

“Every patient was assigned someone to keep an eye on them,” Nagito explained helpfully, and Hajime is so happy he's taking the time to explain it all to him. “Miss Sonia is watching over Gundham, while Fuyuhiko keeps an eye on Miss Akane. I'm so sorry you are stuck with trash like me, but there was no one else too. Miss Tskumi can only do so much on her own, after all.” 

“I'm happy it's you staying with me!” Hajime exclaimed happily, giggling slightly at the end. “I love you thissss much!” He frees Nagito’s hand to hold his hands out on either side of his head, nearly falling backwards when he loses his balance. He giggles at his own clumsiness, and can hear Nagito lightly chuckle as well. His grin grows. He's helping Nagito to be happy! Yay! 

“I'm sure you do, Hajime,” Nagito said. But if Hajime hadn't been sick, he would have been able to tell the other boy was lying through his teeth. As it was, the admission just makes Hajime laugh some more happily. “Now, since I've been here so long, and since you're awake now, I do hope you won't mind if I go to stretch my legs and change. I'll also grab you some new blankets, since those are dirty. Though, I would understand if you'd rather trash like me didn't take personal time right now.” 

“Can I come with you?” Hajime asked, sounding almost like a child(no he wants to lay back down he wants to sleep please let him sleep). 

“That's alright,” Nagito said calmly, stretching as he stands from the chair he'd been in for the past two days. “Miss Tskumi said all three of you need to stay in bed. I'll be back soon, though, I promise.” 

Hajime watches Nagito gather up the bed covers, before hesitantly exiting the room. As he stood in the doorway, he'd looked back at Hajime, now sitting alone on the naked bed, a frown painting his features. He was reluctant to leave the other boy, especially in the state he was now, but he also knew he needed to get him new blankets, and needed to run to the restroom. So, he quickly left the room, leaving Hajime to stare at the now empty doorway. 

This was not good. No one else was in here, so how could Hajime make the others happy? He looks out the window, happy to see birds flying by, and to watch the clouds in the sky gliding lazily, but he quickly became bored, and was itching to see someone else(no stay in bed don't get up no no). 

So, hardly twenty minutes later, Hajime pushes up from the bed, wobbling a little bit on his feet(oh god it hurt he was going to pass out lay back down please). He throws his arms out to catch his balance again, giggling at himself. He must look so silly! He then rips the IV from his arm, not minding the blood dripping lazily from the same spot. 

He wobbles to the doorway, leaning against it momentarily to catch his breath; which is silly, why would he be so tired(he's sick he's going to die)? He just slept for two days straight! 

His bare feet hit the cold, tile flooring with soft slaps, and he sticks close to the wall, keeping a hand on it to keep himself up. He is a bit dizzy, his eyes burning(his entire body was burning and aching go back to bed please). The halls are dark; it had been sunset, so the hospital must be preparing for the night. So he struggles a little bit to see where he is going, but he manages. 

The other patients’ rooms are further down the hall, which is okay, he's happy to walk as far as needed to see them, but he still wishes they were a bit closer. He nearly slips again, and he begins to chuckle light at himself. He can feel sweat beginning to bead along his skin, dripping down the sides of his face and arms. 

He looks down at the ground to focus on putting one of his feet in front of the other, giggling further at the shape of his toes and the way they curled against the ground. He's so focused on this task, in fact, that he doesn't know someone else is in the hall until he hears a gasp and some kind of fabric hitting the ground. 

His eyes fly up, and he spots Nagito at the beginning of the hallway, the new set of covers on the floor in front of him. Hajime’s grin grows two sizes when he sees his friend again, and he stops in his tracks, his free hand coming up to grip weakly at his stomach. 

“A- ah, Nagito,” he gasped, lightly laughing at Nagito’s expression. He looked so surprised- so cute and funny! He must be happy to see Hajime again, and on his own two feet, too! “I- I'm so h-happy to see you!” (he's getting worse his body is hurting more why isn't he laying down please lay down) 

“Hajime!” Nagito exclaimed, sounding panicked. Why would he sound panicked? Shouldn't he be happy, too? And then he realized why just a moment before he hit the ground- he was falling. The thought of it makes him burst out with laughter again, body trembling on the ground as he curls in on himself. There are hurried footsteps before hands are gripping his shoulders, carefully pulling him up into a sitting position. “I told you to wait- I know you'd rather not listen to trash like me, but it's important that you do this one time!” 

His words are harsh and reprimanding, and Hajime can't understand why. His large grin falls a few fractions(thank god his cheeks are aching and sore and he may never be able to stop smiling again) to a confused smile, his eyebrows scrunching together. 

“But I wanted to make you and the others happy,” he explained, his voice weak for some reason. 

“And I appreciate that,” Nagito replied, his voice becoming gentle again. “But it'd make me and the others even happier if you stayed resting.” 

Hajime’s eyes widen, and he stores that statement away for later usage. To make everyone as happy as they could be, he'd have to stay in bed. He could do that, and he'd be happy to! “Now, let's get you back to your room,” Nagito continued, helping him to his feet. “Miss Tskumi is coming to check on you in a few minutes.” 

After he's laid back down on his temporary bed, Nagito rushes to gather up the covers and quickly makes his way back. He spreads both the sheet and thin comforter over Hajime, and then resumes his place in the chair beside the bed. He uses a box of tissues to staunch the blood still dripping from his stinging arm. 

“Thank you for helping me,” Hajime said, grinning at Nagito’s surprised expression. “It makes me happy that you want to help me.” 

“Of course I want to help you,” Nagito said, his voice soft. “You are an Ultimate, after all.” He pauses, and looks as though he wants to say something before, before shaking his head. 

The door opens again a moment later, Mikan walking in with a small medical bag. “H- Hello, H-Hajime!” she said in greeting, in her typical volume. Hajime grins and wave at her, happy to see her. “I- I'm glad to s- see you're a-awake. N- now I h-hope you don't mind if I- I check a few t-things?” 

Hajime salutes her. “You're the boss!” 

Mikan makes a small noise of surprise at his loud volume, before setting her bag on the table beside his bed. She pulls a few items out- a thermometer, a new IV bag filled with a yellow liquid, and a stethoscope. “I- I'm going t- to check your t-temperature really q- quickly,” she stuttered. Hajime opens his mouth, allowing her easy access to check it. She pulls it out after it beeps, and checks it. “S- still too h- high… N- Nagito?” The other boy perks up upon hearing his name. “C- could you make s- sure to p- place one of th- the ice packs in the f- fridge on his f- forehead, n- neck and a- armpits f- for at least th- thirty m- minutes every t- two hours?” 

“Of course.” 

Next was checking his heart rate. He giggles at how cold the stetoscope’s metal was on his bareskin, and he squirms for a moment. “C- could you p- please stop laughing, f- for a moment?” she requested, and he seals his mouth shut, breathing in and out as she directed. “H- high heart rate. L- like the others…” She then works on changing out the IV, gently scolding him for ripping it out. “T- this will pinch. C- close your eyes if you n- need to.” 

There's a bit of stinging pain in his opposite arm, causing Hajime to jump, and then laugh at himself for jumping. Mikan looks back to Nagito. “P- please make sure h- he doesn't take it o- out again.” She wraps the spot that had previously held the IV with a thin layer of bandages. “H- he can take th- that off in s- six h- hours.” 

“Yes ma'am,” Nagito said, and Mikan’s face reddened a little at the referral. She then shakes herself. 

“T- the sedatives sh- should knock h- him out again,” she explained, packing her bag back up. “I- I'll still b- bring up s- some food for both o- of you later, th- though.” 

Mikan then takes her leave, and once again, it was just Hajime and Nagito. 

He could already feel the IV beginning to work, his body sinking into the thin mattress, his eyelids growing heavy. He's even beginning to drift off, when something freezing cold is pressed on his forehead, neck and armpits. His eyes snap open, and he sluggishly looks around for the source. 

“Oh, I'm sorry for disturbing you.” Nagito’s calming voice reaches his ears again, and it soothes him enough for his eyelids to droop again. “I was just doing as Mikan instructed.”

“Okay,” Hajime mumbled, exhausted once again. The small smile stays in place, of course, even as his eyes close, and he falls into unconscious once more. 

The world is bright and blurry when he opens his eyes again, and he can feel large amounts of sweat plastering his hair to the sides of his face. He's panting heavily, his entire body burning, and he feels (horrible) happy. There is something cool and wet on his forehead, and he wants to be enveloped in that coldness- it'd make him much happier to be cold rather than hot at the moment. But he could be happy either way. 

Someone- no, two people- are moving around him, talking frantically amongst themselves. He wets his lips with his tongues, watching the two hazy figures of faces he couldn't make out rushing above and around him. 

He laughs lightly when something tickles his sides. 

And then, he was unconscious again. 

He's unconscious for a long time this time. He could tell when he wakes up again, the corners and edges of his eyes crusted. His eyes slowly open, and he spots Nagito slumped in the chair beside him, still, clearly exhausted. 

Hajime blinks slowly and sluggishly, his entire being aching. But that's okay- he's still happy, and so he can still smile. Of course he could still smile, even if his cheeks are sore. 

His vision is still blurry at the edges, and he can't really move too much. He tried to speak, to greet Nagito again(to tell him to go lay down and sleep he needs sleep they both need sleep please let him sleep), but instead all that comes out is a raspy squeak. 

Nagito’s head snaps up instantly at the sound, and his eyes momentarily meet Hajime’s. They then dart to the IV bag, which appears to be running low on whatever medicines are in it. He couldn't fully tell. Everything was a blurry mess- colors mixing together and the light almost blinding him. He leaps to his feet, grabbing something from the bedside table. He works at the IV bag, replacing it with a new(?) one, before returning to Hajime’s side. 

He rests a cold hand on Hajime’s forehead, and he can't stop himself from leaning into it, letting out a small whine(he hurts he's sorry nagito he hurts please help him). The hand gently brushes the bangs from his forehead as they'd done however many days ago, the fingers carding through his sweat soaked hair. 

“I'm here, Hajime,” Nagito reassures him, his voice just as low and soothing as it has been the past few days. It calms Hajime's nerves just slightly, his smile resting as a small line. “Just go back to sleep, okay?” 

And Hajime can't turn the suggestion down. He's beyond happy to comply, eyes sliding back shut. Nagito continues to run his fingers through his hair, his nails lightly scratching his scalp. The calming motion further helps Hajime fall back asleep, the world going blessedly black once more. 

He wakes after being shaken enough to disrupt his slumber, slowly coming to awareness. Rough hands are holding his shoulders, forcing his aching body to sit up. “Wake up already.” someone said impatiently, and the voice and tone attacks his already pounding head. He groans, but sluggishly opens his eyes anyway, wanting to make whoever was with him happy. 

When he does open them, everything is blurry. The person in front of him, holding him up by his shoulders with a tight grip has a blurry face. He can't tell who it is, but he could tell it was neither Nagito nor Mikan. Speaking of which, where is Nagito? The other boy hadn't left his side for as long as he could remember. 

“Finally.” the rough voice draws his attention again, and he smiles up at whoever is speaking to him. The hands release his shoulders, before one closes around his wrist, with an almost bruising grip. He winces, but doesn't stop smiling. It's okay- this must be making whoever was with him happy, so he's happy too. The person squeezes his wrist even tighter, forcing his fingers to open. Something is placed in the palm of his hand before it is released. His fingers close around it, feeling plastic and a thin piece of metal at one end. “Now,” the person’s voice becomes placating, almost a teasing coo, “It would make me very happy if you injected this into your IV tube. Very, very happy.” 

Hajime’s eyes widen, and he nods, grinning at whoever is in front of him. Okay, so what he's holding is a syringe. And whatever was in the syringe just needed to be injected into his IV tube, and that would make the person happy. That would be easy! 

“Okay, great!” the person exclaimed, their loud voice painful against his ears. “Now, I'll come check on you later. Remember- put that stuff in the IV, it'll make me extremely happy!” 

Footsteps fade from the room, before the door closes. 

Hajime looks down at his hand, his blurry vision just able to make out the shape of the syringe. Everything was still blurry, still mixing together. But he needed to do this, to make that person happy! Whoever they were. 

He groped with the hand connected to the IV until he found the tube, closing his fingers around it. He wasn't entirely sure which part of the tube he was supposed to inject the new liquid in at, but it should be fine anywhere. He grins widely as he thinks about how happy the person is going to be once he does this. 

Readjusting his grip on the syringe, he makes sure to rest his thumb on top of the pusher, and angles it toward the tube. Just as he's beginning to press the needle into the tube, however, the door opens once again. 

He doesn't look, yet, too focused on completing the task he was given. So focused that he doesn't realize the new person is running at him until his wrist is once more being grabbed roughly, yanking the syringe back and away from the tube. 

“Hajime no!” oh, it was Nagito. He sounds scared. Hajime blinks rapidly, turning his confused gaze on the blurry face of the other boy. If he hadn't heard him speak, he wouldn't have known who he was looking at. “What are you doing? Where did you get this?” the other boy is panicked, speaking quickly, almost too quickly for Hajime’s sick mind to keep up with, much less process. “I know it would be an honor to be a stepping stone for the other’s hope- but it shouldn't be you, it should be trash like me, if anyone! Especially not you.” 

Hajime grapples with his free hand at the stolen syringe held hostage by Nagito's thin fingers. “G- give it- back,” he stuttered, somehow managing to speak. His voice is weak, the rest of his body even weaker. Nagito has no trouble gently pushing him back into the pillow at the front of the bed, the syringe suddenly missing from his hand. “Th- they want me- to- to use that t- to make them h- happy.” 

“Who?” Hajime flinched at how cold and angry Nagito’s voice was, not recognizing the tone. He hasn't heard the boy so…. angry, before. And the tone actually manages to make his smile drop to a full frown. “I cannot tolerate whoever tried to make you do this- this hope is sick and twisted if they tried to make you kill youself.” 

“Don't know,” Hajime mumbled, his eyelids once more drooping. “N- not you.” 

There's a pause, before one of the cool hands softly cups his cheek, the thumb rubbing the skin just beneath his eye. “No, not me. Never me, if it's you,” Nagito said, and his voice is gentle again, almost fond as he spoke. “I'm sorry for leaving you again. I won't anymore, if it allowed someone to get so near you.”

Hajime couldn't understand. He whines, the sound a quiet rasp that tears through his throat. “Th- they won't b- be happy,” he muttered, his words beginning to slur together. It would sound incomprehensible if Nagito hadn't been focused on it. 

“That's okay,” Nagito reassured. “You'll make me even happier if you go back to sleep. I know I'm trash, but I know also that you want to make me happy, for some reason.” 

That was a valid argument. Hajime draws a deep breath through his nose, eyes snapping shut. Nagito’s hand disappears from his forehead a moment later, causing him to whine once more in protest, before it instead finds his own hand. He relaxed, finding solace in the anchor shaped as a cold hand in an ocean of sickness and confusion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pls lemme know if everyone is still in character :>


	3. The Body

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heeeyyyy y'all! sorry it took me a lil bit to get this chapter written, haha, but i hope y'all still enjoy it!
> 
> this is also my first time writing the mystery archetype, so please let me know what y'all think of it so far, haha!
> 
> and if you have any guests of who coulda done it, i'm curious of your thoughts :) i did leave a small hint as to who it was somewhere in there, if y'all notice it... then again, it may have just been the person who died's fault... y'all will have to see.... ;)
> 
> anyway, thank y'all once again for all of the lovely comments! they always make me beyond happy!!
> 
> edit: I WAS JUST GOING OVER THE TIMELINE AND REALIZED ID FORGOTTEN TO WRITE IN IBUKI I FEEL SO BAD NOW BUT DONT WORRY SHELL BE IN THE NEXT CHAPTER I PROMISE SOBS
> 
> edit 2: ok i quickly added ibuki in! sorry about that guys, i still can't believe i'd forgotten her. but she is important for the trial, so i needed to get her in. hope y'all don't mind, and yalls comments are already so sweet! thank y'all :D
> 
> make sure to heed the new tags :)!
> 
> hope y'all enjoy!!

He feels sluggish when he wakes up. But this time, he is confused. 

Hajime glanced around the room, eyebrows knitting together as he's met with an unfamiliar environment. Where was this? Oh, it looks like one of the rooms in the hospital.

...Wait. Why is he in the hospital? Sure, his body feels a tad sore, and his head has a slight aching to it, but aside from that he feels fine. He looks down at himself, frowning to find himself dressed in one of the hospital gowns. He massages his cheeks, finding them to be extremely sore, along with every single tooth. It was strange, being able to find each tooth individually as it was wrapped with pain. 

He needs to find out what was going on. 

As he untagles the covers from his legs, spotting his shirt and pants folded on a nearby chair, one of the island monitors suddenly switched on. He paused, feet hovering just over the tiled floor when Monokuma’s face appeared. 

“A body has been discovered!” the bear sang, and Hajime's blood ran cold. “Now then, after a certain amount of time has passed, the class trial will begin!”

The monitor switches off, but Hajime can't tear his eyes from the blank screen. What the hell? He.. he can't remember the past however many days, and now there's a body? What the hell was happening? Where is everyone? Where was everyone when the body was discovered? What is happening-

The door to his room slams open, revealing a winded Nagito. Hajime’s eyes finally snap from the monitor to look at the other boy, seeing a strange mixture of panic and excitement. Or maybe the boy was just excited. He did seem to enjoy investigating the murder scenes. He wasn't sure- he was always so difficult to read. 

“Hajime!” Nagito exclaimed, and Hajime flinches back when the taller boy is suddenly in front of him, his hands tightly grabbing at his shoulders. He has a smile on his face now, glee filling his eyes. “Someone was killed! Aren't you happy they could help us reach for hope?” 

Okay. Nagito was normal. Even if his normal was strange, Hajime has come to learn it well. So why wasn't the situation? 

Hajime brushes both of Nagito’s hands from his shoulders, and makes sure to send him a tight, disapproving frown. Now was not the time to be acting like this, right after a body was found. Especially not the body of a friend they'd been working with. Nagito’s eyes widen at his expression, something like understanding seeming to dawn on him. 

“Why would I be happy about something like that?” he demanded, pushing to his feet. Everyday he strives to better understand Nagito and the way his mind worked, but times like this made it extremely difficult for him to even want to try. No, that wasn't true. Hajime wants more than anything to understand the taller boy, to know what makes him tick, and to be his friend(only his friend. the way his stomach would fill with warmth whenever nagito smiled at him has nothing to do with this). “And why am I in the hospital?” 

He wobbles as his weight is transferred to his feet, and nearly falls, but a pair of cold hands catch him, wrapping around his waist to help him keep his balance. Hajime can feel his face burning at the contact, his skin heating at the places Nagito’s hands had landed despite them being so cold. 

“You don't remember the past week, huh,” Nagito said, and Hajime is caught off guard. He pauses in his attempts to balance himself on his own, not even trying to push the other boy’s hands from his waist yet(they're fine there, anyway. he doesn't  _ need  _ to get them off). The taller boy catches his expression of surprise and chuckles without amusement, “You've been sick for the past week with a disease made up by Monokuma.” 

Hajime blinks owlishly at him. “Disease?” he repeated. “I was sick?” at Nagito’s nod, he groans. “Oh, great. Now I have no idea what is going on.” 

Nagito’s hands finally pull away from him(come back), holding themselves up in the placating way they find themselves in so often. “I'm sure that won't be a problem for you,” he said reassuringly. “I got caught up to speed when I was tied up. I'm sure you can understand even faster than a piece of trash like me.” 

“Right,” Hajime said, grabbing his clothes. He steps behind a screen that was setup on the other side of the room, quickly changing out of the hospital gown. He gagged when he caught a whiff of how badly it smelt. He really has been out of commission for a week, then, huh. That doesn't bode well for him at all. He hates to be out of the loop, especially if the reason for that is due to an illness. It makes him feel useless. “Do you know who was killed?”

Nagito is shaking his head in denial when Hajime steps back out from behind the screen. “Sadly no,” he replied. “I was in the lobby, catching my breath, when I heard the announcement. I came to check on you as soon as I heard it.” 

“Wh- why me?” Hajime asked, his finger pointing uselessly at his chest. 

“Because I was assigned to keep an eye on you while you were sick,” Nagito said easily, like it wasn't a big deal. But, oh, it was a big deal. Hajime’s cheeks reignite with the same heat as before. Nagito had seen him so weak and useless? Who else did? How embarrassing. “So my first thought was to check on you, as it has been the past week. Luckily, they didn't try to get you again.” 

Well, that doesn't sound good. “Again?” 

“Yeah, a couple days ago someone tried to make you kill yourself,” Nagito informed him, just as calmly as before. Though, this time, Hajime could see the slight fear trying to hide behind his calm facade in his eyes. “They tried to make you give yourself too much morphine. At least, that's what Mikan said was in the syringe.” 

“And I was just going to go along with it?” he was completely and utterly baffled by the fact he couldn't scrape up even an inch of this event in his memory. All he could come up with was darkness when he tried to reach that far back. “That's insane!”

“It would have been, if you weren't so happy to listen,” Nagito said, crossing his arms over his chest. His eyes looked to the side, and he suddenly appeared to be distant. “You apparently had the Happiness Disease, as Monokuma claimed. You couldn't stop smiling, and you did anything anyone told you to do if they said it made them happy.” 

Hajime’s heart stops at the explanation. Oh god. What did he do while he had this so called disease? He must have said and done the most idiotic of things. Was that why his cheeks are so sore? Because he'd been smiling non stop the past week? 

“Do you know who… tried to… make me do it?” he asked weakly. This sounded horrible, and made him feel sick to his stomach. Oh, well, actually, he did feel nauseous. He leans against the wall to try and catch his breath, and chuckles at how silly he must look. Wait- what? He rubs at his eyes with his free hand. What the hell was wrong with him? 

Nagito is frowning at him, clearly displeased with the sight before him. “You must have some of the symptoms left over,” he stated, almost sounding depressed over the fact. Oh, great, so he was just going to randomly laugh at nothing? Sounds wonderful. “But, no, I don't know who tried. You didn't know, either.” 

Hajime pushes back to his full height, pinching the bridge of his nose to center himself. Okay. Enough of being sick. He was sick for a week. He has to have his head in the game and figure this all out, now. 

“Right,” he said, steeling himself. “Then let's go find the body.” 

After he nods, Nagito leads the way from the room. Though, it doesn't take long for them to find the murder scene. 

It was in a room a few doors down from Hajime’s, and the scene was horrific. 

Akane’s still body was draped across the side of her bed, her head angled back, her legs sprawled out in awkward angles. A knife is on the floor directly beside her right hand, and both of her wrists are sliced open, along with the underside of her neck. Her mouth is hanging open, her eyes wide with unshed tears. 

The sight makes Hajime want to vomit again. 

Fuyuhiko, Ibuki and Kazuichi were already on the scene, talking amongst themselves. When they notice the other two enter, Hajime can feel their eyes look him up and down. He wants to curl in on himself. He hates other people seeing him sick. 

But he ignores the feeling, and takes charge. That was his job, after all. “What have you found?” 

“You feeling alright, Hinata?” Fuyuhiko asked instead of answering, and Hajime wanted to grab his shoulders and shake him. His health doesn't matter now- they need to find out what happened to Akane! “You were just sick for a week.” 

He ignores the question, and digs in again, “What have you found?” 

Nagito breezes past him to look over the scene for himself. Hajime doesn't stop him; he was a good sort of detective on his own. If he needed Hajime’s help, he'd say so. 

“Not much, but it was obviously a suicide,” Kazuichi replied, his arms crossed over his chest as he looks back over the gruesome scene.

Hajime frowns at the suggestion. “But… that's out of character for Akane. She'd never kill herself,” he argued, and both Fuyuhiko and Kazuichi sigh. 

“You must not remember, but she had the damn Coward Disease,” Fuyuhiko explained, shaking his head almost mournfully. “That might have caused… this.” 

“Poor Akane… I'd written her a song and everything,” Ibuki added mournfully. 

Frown deepening, Hajime takes that fact into account. He brings one of his hands to his chin, mulling over the small bits of information he had. This looked like a suicide, Akane had the Coward Disease, which could have led to her committing… but something didn't sit right with him. Something Nagito had said earlier- someone had tried to convince  _ him  _ to try and kill himself. If that same person got to Akane… but why had she been alone? Nagito also said that everyone who was sick was assigned a nurse. 

“E- eeeek!” his eyes dart to the doorway, now filled with Mikan, Gundham and Sonia. “O- oh no- A- Akane!” Mikan was crying, fat tears rolling down the sides of her cheeks as she looked over the gruesome scene. 

“This is horrible,” Sonia said, her face pale, her hand covering her mouth. Gundham nods beside her, his arms hugging himself. His hamsters are all over him, rubbing against the sides of his face and neck. 

“Her demons must have finally caught up with her, causing her to strike out at her own aura,” Gundham chimed in, and Hajime almost sighed. He was in character, at least. “Maybe it's because I'd been in such a weakened state.” 

“Mikan,” Hajime said, grabbing the three newcomers’ attention. Mikan looks at him with trembling lips, her hands shakily clasping in front of herself. “Who was supposed to be watching over Akane?” 

“F- Fuyuhiko,” Mikan stuttered, and Hajime looks back at the yakuza. He could now see an expression of guilt on the short boy’s face, his lips pulled in a tight frown, his eyebrows knitted together. He also appeared to be trying to grow smaller, his shoulders hunched upwards, his arms crossed around himself. “A- are you f- feeling a- alright too, Hajime?” 

Hajime ignores her question in favor of turning to Ibuki. “Where were you before the body was discovered?” 

“I was at Tiddy Typhoon fixing up my instruments!” Ibuki exclaimed her answer. “Fuyuhiko came to listen!”

“I… I was getting some fresh air,” Fuyuhiko added slowly. He was avoiding Hajime’s eyes, looking directly at the floor. So he was guilty. Though, not for killing or goading Akane to kill herself- Hajime had a gut feeling that he wasn't the one who did it. But of course, he has to follow through with this. “I'd been inside, taking care of her for three days straight. I just- I wanted room to breathe. Like Komaeda. So I walked as far as I could to see Ibuki.” 

“You saw Nagito outside, too?” 

“Yeah. And he was acting weird,” Fuyuhiko said, his eye momentarily darting to look at Nagito’s back. The pale boy was currently in the corner of the room, looking at something Hajime couldn't see from his spot in the room. “And weirder than usual, I mean. He was outside of the motel, but I didn't stick around long enough to see what he was doing.” 

“And when does he not act weird?” Ibuki said with a sigh, leaning against Fuyuhiko’s shoulder. The small yakuza barks at her angrily. 

Hajime hums in response, and then looks to Kazuichi, who looks uncomfortable standing in the room. “And where were you?” 

“Outside, with Fuyuhiko and Ibuki,” Kazuichi said. “I came in with him and we found the body. I know I was supposed to be quarantining, but it'd been a week, and I'd been exposed to you at the beginning of it, anyway. So I figured, if I hadn't been affected up until now that I wouldn't catch it.” 

“Yeah. He joined me and Ibuki when we were heading back, said he'd tag along,” Fuyuhiko adds, nodding his affirmation of the story. 

Ibuki nods her agreement and salutes Hajime energetically. “Yes sir! Fuyuhiko and I walked back to the hospital together, and Kazuichi joined us!” 

“Why'd you want to come into the hospital?” 

“I… wanted to see Miss Sonia again,” Kazuichi replied, his face turning a bright shade of red instantly. Hajime resists the urge to roll his eyes at the answer. 

“He's so lame,” Ibuki said, rolling her eyes. 

“Sure,” Hajime said, and then walks to the aforementioned princess. “Can you tell me where you'd been?” 

“It's so good to see you so well again, Hajime!” Sonia replied, a bright grin on her face. He sighs heavily, tired of the fact that he'd been sick constantly being brought up. He was fine now. Couldn't they all just move on? “But I was in Gundham’s room with Mikan. She was checking him over when the announcement went off. So it could not have been any of us- especially not Gundham. He and his Dark Devas were out for the count- so please do not turn your suspicion on him!” 

Hajime gives her a shaky smile, despite his aching cheeks protesting the action. “It's okay, I believe you,” he reassured her. “Now, would you mind finding Chiaki and Hiyoko and leading them here? They probably can't find out where we are.” 

Sonia grins, throwing one of her hands out. “Yes, I shall!” she announced. She looks at Gundham. “Shall you accompany me?” 

“Yes. I shall join you in your quest of seeking out the two lesser beings,” Gundham replied with a curt nod. “Come, my princess, we shall find them together!”

With a small giggle from Sonia, the two exit the room together. Hajime takes notice of the way Kazuichi watches, a devastated expression on his face. Ah well. It wasn't Hajime’s issue. Though, his face does look a bit funny. And really, he should be smiling, like Hajime was grinning now, and maybe Hajime could help him laugh and-

His shoulders shake with a quiet bout of laughter, one where he can't stop himself. It feels more like a panic attack, than anything, something he was far too familiar with. So of course he tries to catch his breath and calm himself with his panic attack technique, only to find the laughter worsening. He can't stop smiling, or laughing, and it was terrifying. 

“Hey, Hajime.” Nagito appears in his field of vision, and Hajime looks up to meet his eyes, even as he continues to laugh uncontrollably. “I found something you should see.” 

One of Nagito’s hands finds one of his, and the cold fingers wrapping around his helps ground him, if even a tiny bit. He focuses on the feeling of the cool skin on his, and let's Nagito lead him to the other side of the room. Finally, he catches his breath again, and the taller boy offers him a smile. 

“Sorry,” he said, and Nagito shakes his head. 

“Don't worry about it,” Nagito said in response, before gesturing down at the floor. Hajime looks down, finding a dusty, hardly noticeable footprint at the front of the bed. He frowns, and crouches to get a better look at it. It appeared to be made from a thin layer of light brown dust, and most of it has already been blown or wiped away. Only the top half of the print remained, getting rid of the possibility of finding out who'd done it with this bit of proof. “I noticed this earlier. It can't be from Mikan, and definitely not from Akane. It could only be from someone who's been outside. As far as I'm aware, Mikan hasn't left the hospital once.” 

“Who wasn't staying in the hospital?” 

“Uh… Kazuichi, Hiyoko, Chiaki, Ibuki and Nekomaru,” Nagito said slowly. “Though, Kazuichi did say he saw Fuyuhiko outside. And Nakomaru still isn't back with us. It could be one of those three, though.” 

“We can't rule you or the other healthy people out just yet,” Hajime said thoughtfully, cupping his chin. His mind continues to race, trying to connect all of the possible dots. “One of you could have slipped out of the other’s sights. You don't have an alibi for prior announcement, after all. I know Fuyuhiko said he saw you by the motel, but that doesn't completely narrow it down. What were you even doing by the motel in the first place?”

Nagito smiles brightly, something fond in his eyes as he looks at Hajime. “Ah, how I missed your observant nature, Hajime-kun!” he exclaimed. Hajime averts his eyes when his lips itch to smile as well at the sight of Nagito’s expression. He didn't want to get stuck with a grin, or burst out laughing again. “But yes, I was by the motel. I’d taken a walk there to stretch my legs out,” he pauses, his smile faltering, his eyes darkening, “And to see if I could find your would be killer hiding there.” 

Hajime stares at Nagito now, shocked at how the other boy’s aura felt. It was freezing cold, tendrils of ice snapping around him. 

“Did… did you find anything?” he asked. 

“Nope!” Nagito replied, and his smile turns to a bright grin once more. 

Hajime sighs heavily. Nagito’s mood could change like the flick of a switch. He sometimes couldn't keep up with the swings. 

But something still isn't sitting right with him. Especially that one fact: the killer tried to make Hajime  _ kill himself.  _

“And you said the killer tried to make me kill myself, right? What if that was the same situation here,” Hajime pointed out. “Would that count as Akane killing herself, or would that make whoever did it the mastermind, and therefore they are the blackened.” 

Nagito’s eyes are sharp with observation as he mulls Hajime’s proposal over in his mind. 

This is when Sonia and Gundham return with Chiaki and Hiyoko in tow. The last of the group is currently peeking warily around the doorframe, her knuckles white from how tightly she was gripping it. 

“Are you guys sure none of you are sick anymore?” she asked, her eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Because I do  _ not  _ wanna catch that crappy disease.” 

“Y- yes, Hiyoko,” Mikan answered timidly, pressing her pointer fingers together nervously. “N- none of them h- have a high te-temperature anymore.”

“I wasn't asking you, pig face!” Hiyoko snapped, and Mikan draws back with a small cry. But, the small girl does still step inside, avoiding Akane’s body. “Well, it's obvious there shouldn't be an observation right now. She killed herself. End of story.” 

“I wouldn't be so sure, Hiyoko-chan,” Hajime said. “There are plenty of clues pointing to it being another murder.” 

Hiyoko sighs heavily, crossing her arms over her chest and hurting her bottom lip out. “Ugh. Fine, whatever. Investigate me or whatever.” 

“Where were you prior to the announcement?” Hajime begins, and then catches Chiaki’s gaze. “Both of you.” 

“I was in the motel lobby, playing an arcade game there,” Chiaki replied, and glances at Hiyoko sideways. “I only saw Hiyoko leave her room twice since the quarantine began. She was clearly afraid of it.” 

“That's where I saw them earlier,” Nagito said in confirmation, pressing his finger to the tip of his chin. “Hiyoko’s door was locked and Chiaki was indeed on an arcade machine.” 

“Yes, I saw Nagito wandering around,” Chiaki added, yawning loudly. She stretches her arms over her head, before rubbing a tear from the corner of her eye. “I didn't say anything to him, and he didn't say anything to me. But he wasn't doing anything, so I didn't bother him. I didn't want to leave my game, after all.” 

Nagito spreads his hands in front of himself, his eyes lighting with a victorious glow. “Ah, yes, finally! An alibi!” he exclaimed. “Thank you so much for giving such a worthless person like myself something so important, Chiaki-chan. You have always been so kind!” 

“I just said the truth,” Chiaki said with a bored shrug. But then her eyes swipe over the murder scene, and they narrow. “What have you found out, Hajime?” 

Hajime takes the time to explain his findings to her, Nagito butting in occasionally to add anything he may have missed. Chiaki listens with rapt attention, no longer acting completely exhausted, like she usually was. 

Once he finishes, Chiaki goes to look over things herself before their time runs out, allowing Hajime and Nagito their separate times to mull their thoughts over. 

This case was proving to be a difficult one, without a straight answer. He just hoped they'd be able to figure it out during the Trial. 

“Ahem! The time for investigation is over! Everyone, please make your way to the Trial Room!” 

And just like that, Hajime couldn't breathe. 

Time to find the blackened. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lemme know what y'all think! i love comments, they inspire me to continue writing :D


	4. The Trial (Part 1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hihihihihihihihihiiiiiiii
> 
> sorry it's taken me so long to write another chapter again yall ;3; thanks so much for being so patient with me!! 
> 
> i've loved reading all of y'all's comments, from the ones just gushing about it(THANK YOU!!!) to the long ones with thought out theories. which, seeing comments like that really, really makes me happy. this is the first time i've had such thought out comments on one of my fics before, so thank y'all so much!! 
> 
> also, cloverboy on instagram made amazing fanart of my fic 😭😭 please check them out, they're amazing, and here's a link to the post(thank them too for reminding me to post this chapter sobs i'm so forgetful):
> 
> https://www.instagram.com/p/CLqhyGpgf4F/
> 
> also!!! you can find me on tumblr @/din-skywalker (my main blog) or @/le0watch (my anime blog). if you wanna drop some asks or tag me in any posts, you can use either of those accounts ;3;!!
> 
> i love y'all so much, and thank y'all again for being patient and sticking through with me! this fic maybe my favorite because of how responsive y'all have been 💙💙💙
> 
> (once again: sorry for any grammatical/spelling issues. i don't have a beta rip)
> 
> anyway, enough rambling from me! please enjoy the chapter :D

The elevator ride down to the Trial Room is just as tense as ever. Hajime keeps his arms crossed over his chest, as though that could somehow defend him from attack. He keeps glancing around at the faces of his friends- are they friends? They've said they're friends… but if one of them killed another of them, would that still make them friends?-, making sure to keep an eye on their expressions and postures. 

If there was even the slightest give to their assuredness, Hajime would notice it. 

But so far, none of them seemed happy to be here. Then again, why would they be? 

Sonia’s eyebrows are drawn together, and she moved to be closer to Gundham. Gundham has his mouth hidden behind his scarf, his eyes shut in mild concentration. Fuyuhiko is pacing nearby, cursing under his breath every now and then. Kazuichi is fiddling with a small piece of metal he must have snagged, muttering quietly to no one. Chiaki is standing beside him, her eyes narrowed with determination… until she breaks with a huge yawn(he could never think of her being the blackened. she just couldn't be. he depends on her too much). Hiyoko is standing in a corner, her face scrunched in an angry pout as she glares at everyone. Mikan is in the opposite corner, crying quietly to herself. Meanwhile Nagito is how he normally was, a small smile on his face with no sign of what he was really thinking. He was always harder to read than the others. Ibuki is leaning against a wall, her expression darker than usual, even as she hums a tune to herself. 

He draws a deep breath in through his nose, and steels himself. Class Trials were always long and brutal, but he has to keep a clear and focused mind if they were to get through this. 

And they would get through this. 

He just wished people could stop dying. 

The elevator finally reached the bottom, and they piled out into the courtroom. Monokuma is already on his throne and greeting them with too much enthusiasm, Monomi hanging in the air beside him. 

“Oh, how thrilling!” Monokuma squeals, chuckling into his hands(paws?). “I'm so excited to see if you can figure this one out! I haven't been this excited in quite some time- so give it your all!” 

Hajime takes his place beside Hiyoko, and he shares a glance with her. He could see she was just as nervous as him about this whole ordeal, and he has to take another calming breath to keep his mind from panicking. 

The room is filled with silence for at least five minutes. No one wants to start this. No one ever wants to start this. 

But, it seems Kazuichi was willing to make the sacrifice and jump in first for once, “...So we’re all thinking it was a suicide, right?” 

“Well of fucking course it was!” Fuyuhiko snapped, his hand already clenched into a fist. That was fast. “You saw the wounds- it couldn't have been anything but a suicide.”

“That's incorrect,” Nagito interjects, and Fuyuhiko’s sharp eye snaps to his. Nagito raises his hands placatingly in front of himself, as if he could calm Fuyuhiko like that. Well, maybe he could, now. Fuyuhiko has mellowed out a lot since the last Trial. “You see, I'm not sure if I told any of you this, but while Hajime-kun was sick, someone attempted to make him kill himself.” 

There is a collective gasp throughout the room, and Hajime’s eye twitches. And why hadn't Nagito mentioned this to the others before now? 

“And you didn't think to say anything?!” Fuyuhiko demanded, his remaining eye ablaze. “That's kind of fucking important, Komaeda!” 

“Yes, well, I hadn't thought I was worthy enough to tell you outside of the Trial,” Nagito explained, and Hajime can't stop himself from sighing. He was about to go on one of his self-deprecating tangents, wasn't he? He needed to step in. 

“I agree because of that information, we can't instantly rule it out as a suicide,” Hajime said, loud enough to gain everyone's attention. “If this theoretical killer had tried to coerce me in my sickened state, whos to say they didn't try again? The only difference being it was successful.” 

The room falls silent again. “But who could have done it?” Sonia questions, her voice small. “Such a cruel thing to do- to trick someone who is sick is horrible!” 

“I didn't see who it was,” Nagito informs everyone, crossing his arms over his chest with a small frown. “When I got back to his room, he was alone with a syringe. But he did tell me someone told him to inject himself with it.” 

“Was it th- the syringe y- you showed m- me?” Mikan asked. 

“Yeah. The one with the high amounts of morphine,” Nagito said with a nod. “Whoever did it wasn't as skilled a Mikan in the medical field, but knew enough. Not everyone knows too much morphine can kill you, but that is still pretty common knowledge, as opposed to using something like fentanyl, which is far more effective than morphine.” His smile becomes strained, voice dark, “Would have made the job much quicker.” 

Hajime’s throat goes dry at the thought of his dance with death once more. But he shakes himself. “I believe whoever was outside around the time it happened could have been the theoretical killer,” he informed, and the others listened with rapt attention. He hasn't missed the fact that he was one of the three steerers of the Trial conversations. The other two were Chiaki and Nagito, and with the three of them brainstorming together, they could normally come across the answer fairly quickly. “So, the options for this possibility are: Ibuki, Fuyuhiko, Chiaki, Hiyoko, Nagito, and Kazuichi.” 

As he suspected, there are instant protests from the accused. All except for Nagito and Chiaki, anyway. Then again, Chiaki may have dozed off. Either that or she was thinking particularly hard over their options. He's gonna go with the latter. Nagito doesn't care if he's blamed, typically. In fact, a lot of the time, he enjoyed being the accused. Though, this time, he doesn't look as pleased. But he stays quiet, a deep frown on his face. What was different this time? 

“I was in my room the whole time!!” Hiyoko exclaimed. 

“I already told you I needed fresh air!” Fuyuhiko shouted, his eye twitching. 

“No way I coulda done that!” Kazuichi added, his expression shocked and horrified. 

“I was playing my instruments, no need to worry about me!” Ibuki said, looking just as horrified as Kazuichi. 

“I don't  _ want  _ to accuse any of you,” Hajime interrupted their arguments, throwing his hands out in front of himself. He's already tense. He hates blaming them. But they have to get through this. “But Nagito and I found footprints beside Akane’s bed. Those could have come only from someone who'd been outside.” 

They fall silent, but Hiyoko continues to glare daggers in the side of his skull. He clears his throat, and presses on, “We didn't have time to see the sizes of the footprints, but they were covered in dirt. So everyone who wasn't staying at the hospital, state your alibis.” 

“Like I said, dumbass,” Hiyoko snapped, a lot more aggressive than she usually was. Her blood seems to be boiling, her eyes wide with her anger. “I was in my room the whole time!” 

“Why are you acting so defensive if that's the case?” Chiaki said, and everyone looks at her in shock. She'd been quiet up until this moment, and had even testified Hiyoko’s alibi prior. “Neither Ibuki, Kazuichi nor myself can actually be sure you were in your room the entire week. I just assumed at first.” 

“Oh, yeah, that's right!” Kazuichi exclaimed, snapping his fingers. Hiyoko’s eyes fly to him. “Chiaki and I had talked about that before- we never saw you out of it, but we also never even heard you in your room! You could have easily snuck out!” 

“I agree with them,” Nagito said flippantly. Hiyoko watches him helplessly. “I also assumed she was in her room because the door was locked, but I didn't actually hear her when I went to her door.” 

“E- ew! What are you, a pervert, Komaeda?!” Hiyoko said, nearly flying back out of her disgusted shock. “You trying to listen to me in my room? You're disgusting!”

“You can think that, if you want, I am trash, after all,” Nagito said with a sigh. “But I really was just trying to see if the people in the motel had tried to make Hajime kill himself. That is all… though it would make sense for you to not believe me.” 

“Stay away from my door, pervert!!” Hiyoko growled, her teeth clenched. 

Hajime catches a slight movement from Ibuki, and when he glances over, she's frowning deeply, staring directly at Hiyoko. Hiyoko catches her gaze, and her face goes tomato red before she shakes her head. Ibuki sighs but says nothing. It was a quick exchange, and if he hadn't noticed it he would have completely missed it. But it does raise his suspicions. What are they hiding? 

He's going to press that subject when Fuyuhiko speaks up, “Who’s to say you didn't do it, you fucking weirdo?” He’s glaring at Nagito, who blinked owlishly at his accusation. 

“What?” Nagito said, his frown deepening. “But… You and Chiaki said I was by the motel at the time.” 

“You could have killed her or coerced her or whatever before you left!” Fuyuhiko points out sharply, and Hajime narrows his eyes. Something about the accusation doesn't sit right with… 

“Well, I can assure all of you, that I truly did not try to kill anyone this time,” Nagito said with a dramatic flourish of his hands. Hajime watches his body language closely. He may not understand Nagito perfectly yet, but he's learned how to read him, at least a little. He meets Hajime's focused gaze, and smiles. Hajime can't stop himself from smiling back. He hates it. “I was too busy caring for Hajime-kun, after all.” 

“Yeah, so busy you left his room,” Fuyuhiko snapped, arms crossed over his chest. Nagito narrows his eyes at him. 

“If I recall correctly, and I could be wrong,” his tone is cold, taking Hajime by surprise. He rarely spoke like this to anyone of the Ultimates, unless he was extremely upset. “But didn't you leave Akane’s room as well? Isn't that why this is happening in the first place?” 

“Why you…!”

“Fuyuhiko,” Hajime said, deciding to break the argument up. “Both you and Chiaki saw him at the motel. If he was already at the motel by the time you got there, wouldn't that mean he left the hospital  _ before  _ you? It is quite a walk.” 

Fuyuhiko grits his teeth, majorly pissed off now. One of his clenched hands is pressing on his podium, nearly pushing the thing over. 

“But how can we know he actually left before me?” Fuyuhiko demands. “There's no proof other than guesswork. He could have walked faster than me, idiot!” 

“W- well,” Mikan stutters, and flinches when Fuyuhiko turns his glare on her. But with an encouraging look from Hajime, she continues, “I- I saw both of y- you leave. Re- remember, F- Fuyuhiko? I- I was in the m- medicine closet... a- and I saw K- Komaeda l- leave first.” 

Fuyuhiko growls in frustration, but doesn't push the matter any further. But Nagito does. 

“With a similar train of logic to yours, then,” he said, pointing an accusatory finger at the yakuza. “You did it.”

“Wh- what?! You're insane!” Fuyuhiko spat, tugging at the collar of his undershirt. He was either hot from the tense and stuffy atmosphere, or he was nervous to be under this pressure. Hajime narrows his eyes. Maybe his gut feeling had been wrong, from before. He looked panicked. “But would I be covered in blood if I did it?”

“Not necessarily,” Nagito said coolly. “If you  _ coerced  _ Miss Akane to do it herself, then your hands would be clean. Seems like something a yakuza would do… And besides, you accused me of doing it despite the fact I wasn’t covered in blood.” He presses both of his hands on the surface of the podium, leaning over it to appear more menacing. “You seem to be grasping at straws, Kuzuryu-kun. Did you try to make Hajime-kun kill himself, too?” 

Fuyuhiko’s mouth opens and closes uselessly, much like a fish out of water. He seems to be at a loss for words, which wasn't helping his case. 

“It couldn't have been him,” Ibuki says suddenly, foaming slightly at the mouth. “I met him in the room before we headed for the Tiddy Typhoon!” 

Hajime’s gaze darts to her. She was telling two separate stories now. Why? Out of the corner of his eye, he can see both Nagito and Chiaki coming to the same realization. “No that's wrong!” Hajime shouted in objection. “You said you met  _ at  _ the Tiddy Typhoon. Why are you changing your story, Ibuki?” 

Ibuki tilts her head back, scratching at her hair madly. “I know I said we'd been planning for me to see Akane  _ after  _ we’d gone to the Typhoon, but that was a lie,” she said with a sheepish laugh, and Hajime could feel his own laugh bubbling in his chest. He has to forcefully swallow it down. No. He would not be doing that here. “I was… embarrassed that I broke the rule, so I said I hadn't done it yet, so I wouldn't get in trouble.” 

“She even told me to agree with her lie while Kazuichi was distracted,” Fuyuhiko said with a small tsk, averting his gaze from his peers. “I owed her one, so I did what she fucking wanted.” 

“Yeaaaahhhh…. but I didn't want y'all thinking he did it, so it wasn't even worth it,” Ibuki said, her awkward laugh continuing. 

Hajime exchanges a glance with Chiaki. Chiaki nods, and he can see it in her eyes that she believes them. But something still wasn't adding up… The secret Hiyoko and Ibuki were hiding. 

“Okay so since it wasn't me,” Fuyuhiko said. “Obviously… then who is this supposed killer? I still don't see why we're pursuing this line of thinking. It looked like a suicide.” 

“Yeah, I agree…” Kazuichi mumbled, staring at the floor in front of his podium. 

“Can the rest of you state your alibis now?” Hajime asked, and Fuyuhiko sighs heavily. 

“I left the hospital after Nagito to stretch my legs,” he began. “Ibuki had come into Akane's room a few minutes prior to this, and we left to go to the Tiddy Typhoon together. We weren't there for long, and met Kazuichi outside of the hospital and went in together. That's when we found her body.” 

“Kazuichi? Where were you before that?” Hajime turned to him, watching him closely. He hasn't said much thus far, aside from affirming that it was a probable suicide. 

“I was on a walk, too,” Kazuichi replied. “I saw Nagito around the motel when I left, though. So I left a little after he got there. Then I met up with Fuyuhiko and Ibuki.” 

Nagito’s eyes narrow. “I didn't see you, though,” he said. Hajime had the feeling that Nagito was heavily suspicious of Kazuichi- he hasn't seen the other boy this intense in his suspicions before, but now his gaze was cold and calculating, noting everything Kazuichi says and does. 

“Well, uh, yeah,” Kazuichi said, blinking at him. “I saw you outside of the motel when I was already walking away. You didn't see me- I saw you.” 

That wasn't a very solid alibi, but neither was Hiyoko’s. So far, Hajime believes that Fuyuhiko is the one in the clear the most thus far. 

“I did see him leaving a bit early,” Chiaki informed, a finger pressed into her cheek. “I was actually surprised by how early it was. I’d fallen asleep in the lobby the night before, and woke up when I heard him leaving. It was still pretty early.” 

“I was wanting to have time to go to the airport before the hospital,” Kazuichi said sheepishly, picking at the wood and metal on the podium. He wasn't meeting any of their gazes. “Picked this up while I was there.” He held up the small piece of metal that he'd been fiddling with in the elevator, a grimace on his face. “I always like having something to do with my hands, so I got a piece of one of the airplanes to mess around with.” 

Hajime hums, pressing one hand into the surface of the podium. That was true, he could see it in Kazuichi’s face. But something was still off… 

“Chiaki, were you in the lobby the whole time?” he asked. He doesn't want to put Chiaki under suspicion. He trusts her more than anyone else there- but he still needs to rule her out so no one else was suspicious of her. 

“I didn't really go to my room the past week, actually,” Chiaki replied. “I mostly stayed in the lobby unless I neeed food or the bathroom. But other than that, I was in the lobby playing the video game. It was one of my favorites.” 

“I can confirm that!!” Ibuki shouted, with a huge grin on her face. “Every time I went in the lobby, she was there playing it!” 

“Yes, and I saw her there while I was at the motel,” Nagito said in agreement. 

“And you didn't see Hiyoko once?” Hajime pressed. 

“Nope,” Chiaki said with a light hum. “But I can confirm I saw Ibuki and Kazuichi leave earlier on,and saw Nagito come in around the time the murder would have happened. So I can clear Nagito, but not the other two for sure.” 

Hajime nods to her, and stores all of the information Chiaki had just given him. So, Fuyuhiko and Nagito were safe for sure. But Hiyoko, Ibuki and Kazuichi were still under his watchful eyes. Now, to make sure the people that were staying in the hospital truly hadn't left it prior to the murder…

“I know I said earlier that just that group were under suspicion,” Hajime said, and turns his gaze on Sonia, Gundham and Mikan. “But I just want to make sure none of you could have done it. So please, tell me yor alibis.” 

“Well, I can tell you, once more, that it could not have been Gundham,” Sonia said determinedly, her hand thrown out in front of herself. “As I said- he was far too low on energy and health points to move anywhere. And he was looking down on his abilities too lowly then, so he couldn't have convinced someone else to take their life so easily.” She pauses, and deflates. “Though, I cannot clear myself as easily. I can say I was with Gundham the entire week, aside to powder my nose, but I do not have a clear alibi, I will admit. Miss Mikan came into the room just before the body announcement was made, but I was alone with Gundham for most of the rest of the day.” 

She was being thorough and honest, and Hajime greatly appreciated it. She seemed to be keen on proving Gundham’s innocence. “Could someone tell me the symptoms of the sickness?” he asked. “I don't remember the past week, and I'm sure Gundham doesn't, either.” 

“Well it was different for each person,” Nagito said. “You had the Happiness Disease. You didn't stop smiling once, and laughed a lot. You wanted to make everyone else happy, too, and would do anything to make them happy. You also were stuck in the bed for the last few days, basically bedridden. Miss Mikan mostly kept you sedated, so I can already say with confidence it wasn't you. I'm not entirely sure about the other two, however.” 

“Gundham was also bedridden the last few days,” Sonia said gravely, one of her hands coming to cover her mouth. She's frowning, sneaking a glance at Gundham. “He had the Inferiority Disease- meaning he was constantly berating himself and thought himself worse than everyone else. I do not believe with that state of mind that he could have done it, and with his physical state, that he could have gotten up in the first place. Miss Mikan didn't even need to sedate him for him to stay asleep.” 

“Akane was similar,” Fuyuhiko said, glaring at the floor. Hajime could once again see the guilt in his eye. He could tell the yakuza was beating himself up for this. (“i could have done more. i shouldn't have left”, is probably what he's thinking) “She had the Coward Disease, so she wouldn't stop crying and blaming herself for everything. She cried so much by the third day she was passed out and… didn't really wake up again.” 

His teeth are smashed together with his guilt, and Hajime winces in sympathy for him inwardly. He wished he could make him happy…

He shakes himself before he could go down that path. He didn't want to end up hunched over, unable to stop laughing or even breathe. 

“So you all agree none of us that were sick could have done this?” Hajime said in confirmation. Fuyuhiko, Sonia and Nagito all nod their ascent, and he continues, “Alright, so that leaves Sonia and-”

“Wait,” Kazuichi said, scratching at the side of his head. Hajime presses his lips closed, and turns his gaze on the mechanic. “Komaeda said Hinata would do anything to make anyone happy, right? And if Hinata almost offed himself to do just that, who’s to say that he couldn't get up to make them happy?” 

Oh. Well, Hajime hadn't thought of that. Probably since he couldn't even remember the past few days. His stomach could at the thought of not remembering killing someone, more specifically Akane. It made him feel sick. “That is true… I can't confirm nor deny anything I did then,” Hajime said, and grimaces at a realization. He was going to have to rely on Nagito to clear his name. The thought makes him uncomfortable. “Though, it does still seem strange for a third person to convince me to kill and convince Akane to kill herself… But, Nagito, you said you were with me the most. Do you think I could have done it?” 

“No.” Nagito said, and it was a clear statement with no room for argument. He didn't look happy that the suspicion had moved to Hajime, his hands gripping both sides of the podium tightly. His knuckles are paler than usual, arms trembling from his tightly he was gripping it. “He could hardly even sit up, much less walk to another room.” If looks could kill, Kazuichi would have died under Nagito’s glare long ago. He doesn't trust the mechanic one bit, that much was clear. 

Good. Hajime would appreciates someone else keeping an eye on Kazuichi, and keep pressing him while he was speaking with the other suspects. Chiaki already seems to be suspicious of Hiyoko and Ibuki, too, so when it comes back around to pressing them and Kazuichi, he'd allow his two friends to take the lead in the beginning. 

“Miss Mikan,” Hajime said, and the nurse flinches at being the center of attention once again. She wrings her hands together, but nods to Hajime to show she was paying attention. “What were you doing before the murder happened?” 

“W- well, when I w- woke up,” she said, pressing her index fingers together. A few, small tears were already slipping free, but she continues to speak, “I- I realized th- that I was r- running low on a- available m- medicine that I- I needed for the- the sick. So- so I went to th- the medicine cabinet t- to see what w- we had left, a- and to make sure we d- didn't need to r- run to the pharmacy.” She pauses, and glances over to Nagito, who kept his sharp glare on a cowering Kazuichi. “I- I saw N- Nagito le- leave the lobby a- a little later in the day. H- he said he was going on a- a walk. I- I started to mix so- some medicine when I saw F- Fuyuhiko wa- walk past. I- I hadn't seen Ibuki, th- though. P- probably since I t- turned back around. Th- then after I- I finished a couple o- of hours later, I- I headed for G- Gundham’s room to ch- check on him. S- Sonia was th- there.” 

Hajime nods. So her story lined up with Nagito’s and Fuyuhiko’s. This merely clears their suspicions even further. So, he makes it up in his mind that he doesn't need to press those two any further. It was odd, but Hajime hadn't wanted to be suspicious of Nagito in the first place. He trusted the other boy almost in the same way he trusted Chiaki. It was odd because of the fact the boy was also odd, and a lot of the time, suspicious. But Hajime trusts him just as much as he trusts Chiaki, and relies on him just as much. 

He was glad Nagito was cleared. 

“Did you possibly see Kazuichi?” Hajime asked, and Mikan shakes her head. 

“N- No. I- I was busy ch- checking on Gundham’s state,” she replied. 

“I was such a hindrance on your efforts,” Gundham said suddenly, speaking for the first time since the Trial had started. Which was out of character, since he was almost always boasting about his hamst- Four Dark Devas of Destruction. “I have no way to forgive you for nursing me back to my full strength, but I shall always owe you one. If you ever require an exorcism or the slaying of a beast, I will heed your call.” 

Mikan smiles at Gundham shyly. “Of- of course,” she said with a small nod. 

“But you can confirm Miss Sonia was in the room with him?” Hajime asked next. 

“Y- yes,” she replied. “I- I didn't s- see her leave m- much. And i- if she did, it- it was to the bath- bathroom. I- I also had not s- seen her out of Gundham’s r- room that d- day.” 

Hajime hums in response. So Sonia wasn't as suspicious. She still doesn't have the best or clearest of alibis, but he truly believed she wouldn't kill someone. She was always so kind and patient with everyone, truly the Ultimate Princess. But that doesn't mean anything in the Trial Room. Anyone could have done it. 

He then shares a look with Chiaki, and nods to her. Chiaki nods in return, and turns to look at Ibuki. 

“Can you tell me your timeline, one more time? I want to make sure of something,” she said, her quiet voice patient and non-threatening. 

“Yes ma’am!” Ibuki said with an excited salute. She just her chin out to speak, “I left the motel a bit later in the morning, and said hi to you after making you breakfast! I went to the hospital and found Akane’s room. Fuyuhiko said he needed a break so I suggested he walk with me to the Tiddy Typhoon. He agreed and we went there for about an hour until he said he needed to get back. He found Kazuichi pacing outside of the hospital and asked if he could come in, too. We then went to Akane’s room and.. found her.” 

Chiaki listens attentively before asking the important question, “Did you see Hiyoko at any point?” 

Ibuki loses her grin, her hand hanging uselessly at her side. “Uh, no, ma’am,” she said. “Like we all said earlier, she was in her room the entire time.” 

“Can you confirm you-”

“You're still suspicious of me?!” Hiyoko asked with a sharp gasp. She starts to juts her lips out in a crooked pout. “I thought we were done with that. Stop blaming me for everything!!!” 

“We have to make sure with everyone, Hiyoko-chan,” Hajime said, trying to reassure her. He moves to place a hand on her shoulder, but she slaps his hand away, turning her tear filled glare on him accusingly. 

“You're all so mean to me all the time!” she cried. “You blamed me for Mahiru's death, and now that big boob’s death? I wouldn't kill anyone!!” She's full out crying now, waving her hands in the air on either side of herself. 

Hajime tightly frowns and looks to Chiaki for guidance. She sighs and instead looks to Nagito, crossing her arms over her chest to signal him to start his own interrogation. Nagito doesn't hesitate to jab at Kazuichi. 

“Now, I could be wrong, since I am trash,” he began, and Hajime sighs heavily. Why does he always have to talk so lowly of himself? It wasn't necessary, and none of it was ever true in Hajime’s eyes. “But you’re without a very solid alibi, Souda.” 

Kazuichi’s eyes widen and his mouth drops open. “M- me?!” he exclaimed, and grows panicked. “But Mikan doesn't have a good one! And neither does Hiyoko- why are you choosing me?!” He doesn't mention that Sonia also has a pretty weak alibi, but Hajime chalks it up as nothing more than his huge crush on her. He doesn't want to talk badly of her. 

“You're the one he's asking,” Sonia pointed out. She doesn't return his feelings. And Kazuichi looks devastated as he always did. She has her arms over her chest, a disapproving frown on her face. “So please cooperate. It is not that difficult.” 

He sighs heavily, and averts his eyes to a random spot in the room. “It's not my fault I have a bad alibi,” he muttered, forlorn. “All I can say is that I really was taking a walk around the time. Can't prove it much more than that.” 

Hajime looks from Chiaki, and then Nagito. Nagito shakes his head, but Chiaki shrugs. Nagito was wanting to continue pressuring Kazuichi, while Chiaki still had her eyes on Hiyoko. 

He sighs heavily. This was going to be a long trial. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hehe, we're really getting into it. lemme know what y'all think and who y'all think is the most suspicious thus far!!
> 
> also don't forget to let me know if any of them seem ooc! i'm still doing my best to write so many characters at once- it's a brain and writing workout XD


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